Q: Now that you’re in your third house, I’m sure there are things you’ve learned about budgeting, decorating, house hunting, etc. having been through the process a few times now. Would you ever consider writing a post about what your first and second house taught you? -Alison
A: Absolutely — here it is. Every home we’ve owned has taught us something that informed the next one. Our first house influenced how we approached the second, and both of those experiences are shaping decisions in this third house. Stylistically, we expect this home to sit somewhere between the light, beachy palette of our first house and the bold, colorful approach of our second. Beyond color, several practical lessons from the first two homes have guided what we prioritize and what we do differently now. Below are some of the biggest takeaways, in no particular order.
Spend smart: not as much as our first house, but a bit more than our second. Looking back, we probably overspent on finishes in our first home and were too conservative in the second. Our first kitchen remodel included higher-end materials and professional labor. In the second house we saved by painting cabinets and doing most of the work ourselves, which kept costs low but left us wishing for some of the functionality and feel of new cabinetry. For the third kitchen we plan to keep labor costs down where it makes sense, but allocate more of the budget to better finishes and components since we intend to stay here long term. That balance—DIY effort plus selective splurges on elements that matter daily—feels like the right middle ground.
Bring back the cozy. We moved from our first house mainly for more space: working from home and a new baby made a small, one-bath layout feel cramped. Our second house nearly doubled our square footage, which solved the space problem but also created a living area that sometimes felt less intimate than we liked. One surprise was how much we missed the snug, comforting feel of the den in our first home. That longing for coziness influenced our attraction to this current house, which has a living room that feels warm and scaled right, while still giving us more balanced bedroom sizes and additional bathrooms. The result is a better mix of comfort and functionality.
Openness where it matters. We like an airy flow but also want defined, welcoming spaces. In the first house we opened a few doorways and painted with a cohesive light palette to make rooms feel larger. In the second we removed a big wall between kitchen and dining to create flow. One goal we still hadn’t achieved was a seamless connection between kitchen and living room because previous living rooms were additions separated by structural exterior walls. Here, aside from a wet bar and a bookshelf (and the plumbing that goes with it), we have the opportunity to open up those rooms and connect our main living spaces in a way that supports how we actually live and entertain.
Flooring matters—make it a priority. In our first home every floor was updated: new hardwoods where needed and refinished planks elsewhere. That transformation was disruptive while it happened, but it made a huge difference in the finished home. We didn’t manage the same priority in our second house, and not doing so is probably our biggest regret from that chapter. This time, we tackled the hardwoods right away—redoing upstairs floors and polishing downstairs—so the bones of the home feel cohesive from the start. We still have some eclectic surfaces to address (a legacy faux-brick linoleum in the kitchen, for example), but getting the hardwoods sorted immediately has paid off in feel and function.
Make outdoor access easy. Being able to move freely between indoor and outdoor living has become more important to us. In previous houses, accessing the grill or deck often meant a convoluted route through multiple rooms. This house has a large back deck located directly off the main level, which instantly made outdoor time more natural for the whole family (including the dog). Converting a wide kitchen window into doors will further blur the line between kitchen and deck and make outdoor meals and flow routine rather than a special occasion.
Patience pays off. One of the most valuable lessons is learning to accept that a home rarely comes together overnight. In our first house we expected to finish major projects within months and instead spent years gradually transforming the space. That taught us to enjoy the long arc of improvement instead of being frustrated by it. By the second home we appreciated how projects can evolve over time and how thoughtful, measured decisions often produce the most meaningful results. In this third house we’re embracing that same approach: making careful plans, saving for the things that matter, and enjoying living in a space that’s always a work in progress.
I’m sure we’ve absorbed other lessons along the way—some conscious, some not—but these are the big ones that have guided how we choose and live in this home. How about you? What have your past living situations taught you about what you value in a home now?
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As a little Friday bonus, here are a few active projects and conversations happening on the community forums (images shown below) along with this week’s giveaway winners announced in our usual place.
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| by PrettyOrganized | by curvyfurniture | by crabandfishblog | by karazzies |
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