Yup, it’s a rare Sunday post — we have an exciting bathroom update to share. We’ve previously praised affordable American Standard toilets, but we’re eating those words. Why? Because we just came across a toilet that blew us away. Think Jake Gyllenhaal-level charisma: sleek, high-end, and hard to beat. Feast your eyes on this showstopper:
Who wouldn’t be intrigued by a toilet that includes:
- a heated seat and heated foot blower
- ambient lighting integrated in the bowl
- motion-activated lid and seat that open and close automatically
- advanced bidet functions with customizable settings
- built-in speakers and a remote docking station for music
- an integrated air dryer for post-wash comfort
- a touchscreen remote to control every feature
Of course you’re thinking this must cost an absolute fortune. But surprising as it sounds, the price is under $5,000.
We decided to splurge. After all, what’s the point of constant DIY projects if you can’t treat yourself with small comforts? A heated seat and air drying feature are a morale booster — especially after long days of painting or swinging a sledgehammer. Imagine finishing a hard day’s work, stepping into a bathroom with ambient bowl lighting, cueing up your favorite tunes, and using a remote to begin the gentle air-dry cycle. It’s a little luxury that makes everyday life feel better.
I also can’t help but love how it looks set in an all-glass bathroom with a city view. I’ve always admired that modern, open aesthetic.
Wait for it…
Okay, you probably suspected something. What gave it away — the ambient bowl light, the price tag, or the fact this is a Sunday post? (Thanks, April Fool’s Day, for rolling around on a Sunday this year.) You know us well.
Psst — anyone else find it ironic that a $4,600 toilet doesn’t qualify for free shipping?
Pssst — April Fool’s jokes are a bit of a tradition here. We’ve done a few in past years as well: last year’s, the year before that, and the year before that.